


Lay Me Gently in the Cold Dark Earth

by olliebabe (tennebee)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Light Angst, M/M, Not Actually Unrequited Love, Post-Time Skip, friends to strangers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:41:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,572
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27533173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tennebee/pseuds/olliebabe
Summary: When you lose touch with someone that has been a constant part of your life for years, it's almost as if you have lost a part of your whole being. In Kunimi’s situation, it was just life running its course. People grow up and drift apart.
Relationships: Kindaichi Yuutarou/Kunimi Akira
Comments: 3
Kudos: 24





	Lay Me Gently in the Cold Dark Earth

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kogamaoritsu](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kogamaoritsu/gifts).



> hello! once again this fic is a commission for @maoritsus, again thank you so much. This was beta read and edited by my good friend @appllelle :3. pls enjoy!

When you lose touch with someone that has been a constant part of your life for years, it's almost as if you have lost a part of your whole being. It’s not usually something that happens all at once, but instead, a gradual pain of realizing you are no longer as important to this person as you had been years before. Slowly the stream of text messages trickles dry, day by day, until they eventually stop coming altogether. Phone calls, if any, are short and only come a few times in the span of a few months. Are you even still friends if your relationship has been reduced to this? It's bitterly pathetic and leaves you wondering, how did we end up this way? 

In Kunimi’s situation, it was just life running its course. People grow up and drift apart.

It wasn’t completely Kindaichi’s fault that they had grown apart, this was a two-way abandoned street. Kunimi himself had just been too busy lately to even think about going out of his way to start a conversation, he was already barely able to respond to people that did text him first. The aforementioned people were mostly just his parents checking in to see if he was doing alright and keeping up with his studies. Which he usually replied with exasperated and instinctual affirmatives, followed by cloaked pleas for his mom to not visit. He doesn't need or particularly want to be nagged in person, too. He was completely fine living alone, it has been almost two years anyways. 

So yes, he could understand why his friend hadn’t been keeping up with his texts, not that he was ever that good at it, even before life had gently, yet agonizingly, nudged them apart. It was extremely likely that Kindaichi was just busy and unable to answer him back. And it most  _ certainly _ doesn’t hurt him to check his phone and see a wall of blue, shamefully held up by a tiny timestamp from last year. Akira was fine, right now he doesn't have much time to focus on Kindaichi in all honesty. 

  
  


His feelings for the subject at hand were… complicated at best. The number of times he had caught himself staring a bit too long at someone he considered his best friend was embarrassingly high. It made him feel just uncomfortably… conflicted if he thought about it too long. So maybe in a way it was just easier if they lost touch, he couldn’t be distracted by Kindaichi like this. It might sound selfish to just allow his best friend to drift off like a child’s sealed bottle of secrets into an endless sea, but  _ Kindaichi _ was the one who hadn’t texted  _ him _ back. Their last conversation, if you could even call it that, was almost a year ago. Since he didn’t care, Kunimi shouldn’t either. 

So why did his heart ache so much when he thought about never being able to recover their relationship, losing him for eternity, and living the rest of his life with a Kindaichi-sized blotch on his existence, everywhere he went?

It wasn’t like this had truly come out of nowhere, of course. His parents had told him their anecdotes about this exact situation, which he mindlessly nodded along, only to roll his eyes on his way back to his bedroom. That wouldn’t happen, Kunimi and Kindaichi had been inseparable since middle school… even if they were going to different universities it just wasn’t conceivable for a friendship,  _ their  _ friendship, that has lasted so many years to burn out over a train ride that lasted a few hours. Looking back on it now, he wished for the return of that childish naivete, but simultaneously, it was just more salt in the wound.

For now, he needed to focus on his studies.  _ Oh god, his studies _ . Opening his eyes, he was met with the harsh light of the lecture hall that he had been dozing off in. This was the exact reason Yutaro Kindaichi needed to just stay out of his head. He was so, so far away, a long train ride Kunimi couldn’t afford far away, and clearly didn’t care anymore. 

Why else wouldn’t he have texted back in months? 

He pushed these thoughts all the way to the back of his head and decided it was best if he tried to regain focus and pay attention to class, going through the rest of his day without sparing Yutarou Kindaichi another thought. 

  
  
  


“Hey, you used to play volleyball right?” A voice asked him a few days later, disrupting his study session and breaking his intense focus on the monotonously neat stack of notes. 

A harsh light being flipped on in his dorm caused him to look up from his desk, seeing his roommate standing in the archway of their room. The two of them weren’t extremely close, but they got along well enough that he would consider them friends. 

Kunimi nodded, “Yeah, why are you bringing it up so suddenly?” 

“Well, I have these tickets for a game later. No one else is free and I really don’t want to waste my second ticket. So, you in?”

He closed his eyes in thought, tapping his fingers against his desk. “Well, it all depends on who's playing.” While his passion and love for the game remained, he had been just too busy to keep up with this season. That and-

“ Tamaden Elephants and…” 

Well, that was, sure enough, a reason to not go. 

At first, he had been extremely happy for Kindaichi for making it in the team roster. They had even made plans to meet up at some point and celebrate… Akira was sure that maybe if he saw him in person he would be able to muster up the courage to confess, that if his friend could become a professional volleyball player then he could confess to his crush. 

_ ‘just let me know when youre free’ _

Read. He didn’t get a response until two-and-a-half days later. 

_ ‘sorry. not free anytime soon.’  _

_ ‘oh thats okay. im busy too’ _

This time he didn’t get an answer and soon enough his message left on read by someone he once considered the closest person in his life became his last priority. Overwhelmed by his own life.

“-so do you wanna come or what? If you’re busy I’ll just ask someone else.” His roommate once again dragged Kunimi out of his endless contemplations, thank god for that. He might’ve just sat there and spiraled for an ungodly period of time, if he ever stopped before the sun rose again. 

  
  


Yes, ask someone else. Ask literally  _ anyone  _ else but him. He didn’t want to watch a game and spiral deep into his emotional agony at the same time. One thing at a goddamn time, please. If just the thought of Kindaichi stung this badly, then he didn’t want to know what seeing him in person would do. 

“Yeah sure, just give me some time to get ready.”

What could else he say? He was stupid. 

_ Stupid _ ly in love, but he would never admit to that. 

“Thank you so much, it seriously would’ve sucked if I had to waste this ticket.” 

Akira tuned him out as he closed his laptop, gathering his notes, and returning his study material into their designated places. Shutting his eyes yet again, he braced himself for the evening he had just agreed to. Being impulsive was never like him, so why did he decide that now was a good time to start? With a deep sigh, Kunimi Akira opened his eyes and stood up from his desk, going to put on something slightly more presentable to face the consequences of his decision. 

If he was going to force himself to see Kindaichi, he was at least going to look good when he did. Kunimi really didn’t want to think about the very slight chance of actually running into him, he might just implode if that happened. Then,  Yutarou Kindaichi would really never leave his mind. 

* * *

  
  
  


Somehow, despite his brain’s desperate pleas for him to find some excuse to not go to this game, Kunimi Akira still found himself sat in the stands, absolutely unable to tear his eyes from Kindaichi. Every move that he made had his heart fluttering in his chest, his concerns about Kindaichi never leaving his mind if he went to this game really were warranted. No wonder his feelings won over his brain, he had it  _ bad _ for this man. 

In highschool at least he felt like he had it under  _ some _ control, but after not seeing Kindaichi for so long, it was definitely harder for him to suppress his flushed face from his roommate beside him in the stands. 

“Are you alright?” his roommate inquired at one point, startling him out of his focus on the game. 

Quickly, he tore his eyes from Kindaichi, “Yeah! It’s just been such a long time since I've been to a game in person, being so busy and all. I’m taking it all in since I don't know when's the next time I'll be able to attend one.” It was a lie, and anyone who knew him, even briefly, would be able to tell that. Thankfully, his roommate seemed to drop it, but not without a suspicious survey of his countenance. 

“...okay.”

The rest of the game seemed to pass by quickly, the players on the court becoming hurried blurs. As the ball dropped, Kunimi let out the breath he had been holding, and just like that, it was over. The feeling of defeat was all too familiar for him, and he couldn't bear to linger and see the pain of losing displayed on Kindaichi’s face again. Not after all those years, all those matches they played together. 

_ ‘We’ll do better next time Kunimi.’ _

_ ‘You say that every time, I don't even care. You’re the one crying.’ _

_ ‘So are you.’ _

_ ‘No, I’m not.’ _

_ Carefully, the other boy reached out and swiped away the tear crawling its way down his cheek. Meeting Kindaichi’s eyes, he felt the heat between the proximity of the other’s face. _

_ ‘Yes you were.’ _

Falling for your best friend had to start somewhere, huh. 

Moments like those were the exact reason that Kindaichi remaining in his life was too complicated. So, for his own well being, he decided it was time to leave before he did anything stupid. Swiftly, Akira got to his feet and made a break for the exit before a loud yell resounded from across the stadium.

“Kunimi?!” 

Fuck,  _ that _ voice. Chills ran down his spine as his brain screamed at him to not turn around and keep walking. All he had to do was keep his head down and he would never have to deal with him ever again, Akira could even block him on all his social media as an extra measure. 

If he didn't want to see him so badly, then why was he turning around? 

When their eyes finally met, it felt like some stupid cliche in all those awful romantic movies they used to make fun of together. Time seemed to stop, and all Kunimi could do was helplessly watch the other boy run to catch up to him. Sweat helplessly dripped down his face, though it very easily could have been tears, and something dully painful in Kunimi’s chest strummed at that thought. 

Kindaichi stood before him panting heavily, his hands pressed to his knees.”You… You came…” he said breathlessly, tilting himself to look up at Kunimi. 

“I did.” He mentally cursed himself for coming off so cold - after all this time, that was the only thing he could say to someone that had been such an important part of his life? “I came with a friend.” His roommate… oh, he had completely forgotten about his roommate. He must have been so confused watching him run off so fast. Hopefully, they would be able to find each other once the crowd died down, but Kunimi really wouldn't blame him for leaving without him. 

  
  


“Oh, where are they… am I holding you up-”

“No!” Kunimi interjected quickly, waving his hands slightly. “They’re not waiting for me, I can talk.” He was met with only silence, was Kindaichi  _ looking _ for a way out, for a way to end this conversation? “If you want you can-”

Before he could finish he was interrupted with a soft, “-I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to ghost you like that, I’m just… really stupid.” 

“I see nothing’s changed then,” Kunimi stifled a chuckle. “But… it was my fault, too. I probably wouldn't have seen even if you did text back.” 

“Then we’re both stupid?”

“No, just you.”

In moments like this, it was almost as if the passage of time between their last meeting had completely dissipated, dissolving into the years of practiced teasing and tender memories. Instead of the awkward conversation Akira had been dreading, their old banter re-emerged, soothing his anxieties. It felt good, like a warm blanket covered over his worries and doubts about this very situation, yet only a few words had been spoken. 

“Look,” Kindaichi started, standing up from his kneeled over position. “I know you came with your friend so it's totally okay if you say no but, do you want to go get something to eat? I… I miss going out to eat with you after games.”

Kunimi couldn't help the small smile that had worked its way onto his face. “I’d love to.” Oh god, did that sound too overexcited? It was just a friendly dinner to reconnect over. Maybe it was even just because he was here, with Kindaichi, and the sickly sweet nostalgia was already addicting. 

“It’s a date then.” Kindaichi grinned at him. God, Kunimi felt his heart race just from that one look. How dare he come back into his life to make him feel like  _ this _ all over again, calling their dinner a date? What kind of sick sadist was the man he once knew?

But, did those feelings ever really leave?

“Are… are we really calling it that?” Damn it, he could practically feel the way his face was heating up at the implications of going on a  _ date _ with  _ Kindaichi. _

“I guess, unless that sounds too weird. Doesn’t it? Because if it is we can totally just go and get drinks, I know a really good bar not too far from here-” Kindaichi seemed to be in the exact same position as him, stammering over his words and overthinking every little thing. Good to know they could still read each other like a book. 

“Just shut up and come have dinner with me, loser.” Akira sighed, reaching his hand out for Kindaichi to take it. 

“I thought I was the one asking  _ you _ to dinner.” 

“You did, but then you got all weird so I took everything into my own hands. Like always.”

“No? When have you ever willingly done anything… ever?”

“I’m willingly going on this date with you…. Kinda.” 

Their shoulders bumped together as they walked, bantering and arguing like things had never truly changed between them. The night, filled with laughing over drinks, small moments sparkling between them, proved their chemistry still burning, still alive. And as Kindaichi hugged him at the end of the night, warm and real and  _ there, _ Kunimi thought maybe  _ this _ would last for a long, long time. 


End file.
